Stupid Sex Tricks: Fake flash, real arrest

Well, howdy there, Beer Can Man. Ill-advised dress-up games seem to be a thing with you, eh? Let’s hope this doesn’t become a thing for anyone else…

Meet Jacob Bovia.

The 28-year-old Maryland resident is facing five criminal charges for exposing himself to several women around the campus of Anne Arundel Community College, according to police.

And by “himself,” cops are referring to the set of fake genitalia that Bovia allegedly showed female victims while he was seated in his Honda Accord. Police reported that when they collared Bovia–who was “acting suspicious” in a school parking lot–he “was in possession fake genitalia.”

During questioning last Friday, Bovia reportedly told cops that he flashed the phony junk on “several occasions” during the past few weeks. He was subsequently charged with two counts of disorderly conduct and three counts of indecent exposure (for the simulated act).

It’s kind of odd to be charged with indecent exposure for flashing a twig ‘n’ berry set that isn’t actual, living flesh, but I guess the law doesn’t discriminate on that count. If it looks like a cock, and gives unwitting passersby a shock like a cock, it gets busted like one.

Moral of story: Guys, even if that rig isn’t really yours, keep it in your pants.